My dear friends, family, and everyone who has just stumbled across (or, indeed, stumbled over) this while innocently travelling through the endlessness of the Webonet,
I’d like to inform you all lovely lot that I’ve been going through some changes lately, a kind of metamorphosis maybe, as one may say. And I know what you’re thinking, so a) Yes, I know that by our unique nature of human beings, all of us live lives full of constant changes, and I do my best trying to get over it and stop playing such a drama queen, and I’m aware that there’s still no excuse for my betraying my loyal audience and being silent for so long, and b) No, I did not wake up one morning and realise I’m a monstrous insect-like creature on the outside as well, and thank God for that.
I’m talking about changes of different nature, changes that do not involve growing hair and nails and losing a thin layer of skin every day, changes that first happen somewhere deep inside one, on the unknown and undiscovered land of one’s soul and spirit, and only then are able to affect the image one’s acquaintances can see. Changes quite crucial. Changes that are probably milestones.
To begin with, I started caring about the state of me, which is an action taken for granted by most normal people, but not me. To be honest, it took me almost a decade to overcome some unpleasant stuff that happened and get rid of a need to shovel everything I see before me down my throat and waiting for the world to accept that, and then not eating for days because the timetable is too full of classes and there’s another English Olympiad coming and how can you possibly think of food when you have to learn English until you fall asleep on your way to another test/essay writing task/ text/ something else involving the English language (an actual thing that actually happened). Now I’ve gone as far as taking some pills that are supposed to make everything inside my body closer to the norm, deciding to drink nothing but water for a month (just as an experiment, maybe – I read it had a positive outcome on some people from the Internet, so why not), and consuming as many vegetables and fruit as I can afford. It might not seem like a big deal, but I feel like this is a huge step forward for me. I even bought this Clockwork Orange thing that makes your eyelashes look pretty and curly and started polishing my nails.
Secondly, I decided to make this blog a wee bit different. There won’t be that many posts, but I hope they will make more sense. Now there will be a new post every weekend, so, four posts a month, and one of them will be a review of a book/ television show/ film/ podcast/ something else, another one will be devoted to something about a place, event, or a person (a shopping centre in Liberec/ Prague’s main square/ Ještěd/ a guy who owns a food cart near our school/ etc), then I’ll share with you something I’ve created, be it a short story or a doodle or whatever I will create, and the last post will tell you about some outstanding points of my life this month, like this one does. And there also will be some accidental posts that I’ve been meaning to write for ages.
(as you’ve probably noticed, the colour of the letters will be different as well, probably. I haven’t made up my mind yet, to be frank)
And there’s even more changes. I’m now friends with Nastya, one of my groupmates. That is important because most of the people I communicate with are from my previous life of a fat spotty lonely schoolgirl, which isn’t helpful in the process of creating a new me and are mainly my parents, which isn’t ideal either; and all of the people I communicate with are far, far away. Besides, she’s both interesting and interested, which is good. She voluntarily listened to a-more-or-less-complete-story-of-my-life-told-from-my-perspective, told me her own one, and also said that she genuinely thinks I’m cool, which is amazing words to hear somebody say. What is more, as I previously mentioned, I teach her English now, and even though there’s not much profit made out of it, it’s still great to have money, especially when you’re paid for something you like doing.
And the final new thing is that I will now be getting ready for another new page in my life. This year is kind of a rehearsal, because I still am a bit of a person I used to be before all this screw-this-I’m-outta-here thing happened and my surrounding is still mostly the sort of people I don’t want around myself. I have even found a few candidates for my first rented room, and they look rather good – as well as their inhabitants, and I hope they’ll be the kind of flatmates people from most sitcoms have – kind-hearted, ready to help people who will become your close friends over the years spent together and whom you will miss after moving out.
And I finally decided that studies matter and homework should be done properly and you won’t achieve a single thing, young lady, if you don’t improve.
Hope you’ve had some milestones this month, too (even the smallest ones – they are equally important, or even more), and hope there will be lots of them ahead.
p.s. the title